Write about siblings and open adoption.
For a moment I considered sitting this one out. And since I’m sleep deprived and cranky perhaps I should have. Afterall I don’t have any children besides Kidlet. The ex doesn’t have any children besides Kidlet (that I know of). I’m only privy to his interactions with KidBrother based on what I see during visits or what I’m told. So what could I possibly have to say on the subject of siblings and open adoption?
Well I hope to have more children eventually and when I do I know I will consider them Kidlet’s brother(s) and or sister(s). I know J&M will consider them Kidlet’s siblings. I hope Kidlet will consider them his siblings. I hope he will recognize his biological connection to them the same way he does with me. I don’t know what that/those relationship(s) will look like, but I have faith that we’ll all do the best we can to figure it out.
The sibling relationship between Kidlet and my theoretical future children is the easy part. Well as easy as anything is in the complex relationship that is open adoption. What is harder, is knowing how to navigate a relationship between my someday children and KidBrother.
KidBrother has biological siblings and he has Kidlet. Will he reject the notion that my children, Kidlet’s biological siblings, could be anything to him whatsoever? Will he embrace that the siblings of his brother as his own? Will reality land somewhere between those two extremes? Will my children’s presence regardless of how good of relationships they have with KidBrother cause him wish for better relationships with his biological siblings. Will it lead to him resenting them? I hope that KidBrother is able to see Kidlet’s someday siblings as his family too and I think that with the way family is being defined in his life thus far it should be ok. Only time will tell and thankfully I have a few years yet before I plan on attempting parenthood.