November 25, 2007
· Filed under Adoption, Holidays, Music
Yes I do want to believe that I will have a good holiday this year. I do want to believe that as I watch my niece open her presents I wont have to leave the room to sob silently in the bathroom. I want to believe…
I love Christmas music. And there is only a short window in which I can listen to it (day after Thanksgiving til Christmas). Every year I re-burn a Christmas compilation switching out a few songs or just rearranging my favorites but this year I’m missing last years disc. That means the new songs I added last year are lost (no I didn’t back it up on my computer. So today I went on a search today for Sometimes you have to work on Christmas (Sometimes) by Harvey Danger (stupid itunes doesn’t have it). It’s really the only lost song that I HAVE to have on this years disc. I found it FINALLY (don’t even want to think how long I was looking and how many stores I visited) and on the same cd is the following song, which is definitely going to be on this years compilation.
This holiday – Late Tuesday
The icicles forming around the edge of your house
Compliment how you feel this time of your
When so much of the world’s caught up in frivolous joy
The rest and you can’t wait for it to end
Oh but this holiday you will laugh and not cry
I don’t know the reason why, but I know it
And your seasonal sadness you’ll release from your hold
For I know that you want to believe
I know the decorative lights hold no more magic for you
And the beauty of snow reminds you you’re alone
Somewhere in the night you hear some children singing
A touch of loveliness in the pain of remembering
Oh but this holiday you will laugh and not cry
I don’t know the reason why, but I know it
And your seasonal walls you will let tumble down
For I know that you want to believe
Friends they will call and remember you
Smiles you’ll realize are for you
And your eyes waking up to the life and the love
That is ready and waiting to be renewed
Oh but this holiday you will laugh and not cry
I don’t know the reason why, but I know it
And the hope that you seek will find its way to you
For I know that you want to believe
November 19, 2007
· Filed under venting
Most of the time when someone is railing against socialized medicine or universal health care they paint a picture of lazy people who refuse to help themselves and instead will be getting medical coverage paid for my the hard earned dollars of others. Well guess what thats just not an accurate picture of Americas uninsured. How do I know? Because I may soon find myself among them.
I am have a college degree and a full time job WITH BENEFITS. Recently I had to decide between birth control or my prescriptions for my Migraines. Then I couldn’t even afford to choose and had to say goodbye to both. Now we’ve learned that the plan our company offers is being discontinued. Our new plan is good, but of course it is more expensive. Our premium will double. Our copay will increase by 50%. Our price for generic prescriptions goes down by a third but if your meds arent available in generic yet…no change for you (me). Well at least they didn’t increase.
I may be able to figure out a way to afford the premium. But even then I wont be able to afford a doctor visit or a prescription. So whats the point. I’m considering paying to break my lease and moving to a cheaper neighborhood. Or maybe I’ll just opt out of health insurance and pray I dont get really sick.
November 16, 2007
· Filed under Adoption
When I was in the ninth grade my father thought it would be a good idea to get me math software for christmas. yep I was struggling in alegbra. I resented that gift for quite some time. Maybe i still do a bit. So thats why I’m crushed right now to realized I am that person.
I bought my son new educational games for this leapster, helped my mom pick out some nifty puzzles, one’s a world map the other’s a map of the US and they come in a book with all sorts of fun facts. And today I found the PERFECT gift. You see he doesn’t really like reading (which I dont understand because reading is my joy) But I found a book called “Larry Gets Lost in Seattle” and it’ll be easy enough for him to read and it’s full of facts about the city which hopefully he’ll get to visit eventually (at this point it’s easier for me to go to their side of the country).
So here I am so very proud of my gift choices but cringing at the same time because oh my goodness I have become that person. the one who buys educational gifts. *gasp*
November 7, 2007
· Filed under Uncategorized
November 5, 2007
· Filed under dating
Tonight we kissed. I have a paper to write. But I can’t concentrate. Because tonight we kissed.
Okay I am aware I sound like a silly twit.
November 4, 2007
· Filed under Uncategorized
Ok I have noticed a trend. I read your posts and click to leave a comment. I type said comment then re-read and swiftly delete. For each comment I actually submit I probably have typed at least 10 and erased them. Some people probably have no clue I even read their blog because I spend so much time erasing comments I may have never actually left one for them. So in an effort to control my pansy but ways I am going to try to refrain from re-reading my comments before I submit them. This unfortunately means bad spelling and grammar will have to stand. sorry bout that.
